Thursday, November 16, 2006

I've Jumped The Shark

I have completely jumped the shark here in the corporate world. I am now accustomed to corporate vernacular like it is second nature, using phrases that have made their way into a Dilbert cartoon or on the show The Office. If you had told me ten years ago that the following phrases would be flowing effortlessly off my lips, I would have shot you. Here are some of the highlights of my daily work:

“This is a ‘roll-up your sleeves’ type of meeting.”

“My goal in our meeting today is to leverage your subject matter expertise for the training material I am currently writing for the course you are presenting.”

“Let’s partner together to meet our objectives.”

“What is the schema?”

“Do you have the service level analysis for last month?”

“Who owns this process?”

“The turnaround time for the business review is very aggressive this month.”

And my personal favorite: “I see myself in a corner office with a window in 10 years.”

God. Please. Help. Me.

4 Comments:

Blogger Kathy McC said...

Did you get the memo about those TPS reports? ;-) As long as you don't start "Hawaiian Shirt Day", I think you'll be alright.

2:38 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sorry to hear that.

I totally don't miss the corporate world. All those meetings to discuss whatever. Yuck.

11:49 PM

 
Blogger Unknown said...

Man, it's like a scene from The Office. WHich, by the way, is my favorite show on TV. :-)

5:12 PM

 
Blogger the mystic said...

Oh funny! I haven't worked for six years (getting ready to go back hopefully in the next month), but my best friend uses certain phrases that crack me up and once I was like, "Hey! I heard that on The Apprentice!"

It was, "at the end of the day..."

11:23 PM

 

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