Monday, January 08, 2007

An Open Letter

To the dumbass who doesn’t know how to park their car in one spot:

Apparently you are not aware of the fact there are 7,499 other people working in the building and that parking spaces are at a premium for this office building. Or maybe you need new glasses to see the bright, white line that indicates where cars are to be parked. Or better yet, perhaps you are a parking space bully and want other people to know that you are special and require two spaces instead of one. Well, I have one suggestion for you if that is the case. There is a far away space located in the corner of the parking lot that is always available without other cars around it and you can take up as many spaces as you desire. I know this, because, thanks to my tardiness this morning, and poor parkers like yourself, I was forced to park my car in said lot, otherwise known as Bum Fuck Egypt.

Whatever your New Year’s resolution was this year, I would revise it to include parking lessons. Instead of spending all that money on your Volvo on loan payments and insurance, I would suggest trading it in for a lesser model and spending the difference on driving school. Because by the likes of your talents for parking, it would be safe to assume that you are probably not much better of a driver either.

Kisses,
The Pillow Chick


**************************
Andrew's birthday news to come at a later post. For today, I needed to get this letter out and off my chest as part of my all around crappy mood today...

6 Comments:

Blogger soccer mom in denial said...

And how about etiquette lessons for the jerks that take up two seats on the commuter rail?

8:39 PM

 
Blogger Karla said...

Some peoples kids!
People with a self importance complex annoy the crap out of me.

I dare you to print this letter and stick it on their car if they do it again.

8:52 PM

 
Blogger Laura said...

yep-- I am sure they are the same people who don't fill up the copy machine after they make 9,000 copies.

Or maybe they are the jerks who sneak away when they jam the copier.

They have to be one in the same.

9:41 PM

 
Blogger Christina said...

Oh, I hate those people. And I really hated them at Christmastime, when they'd park their cars across two spaces at Easton, when there were no other parking spaces to be found.

1:05 PM

 
Blogger Heather said...

Hilarious letter!

That annoys me too.

9:54 PM

 
Blogger Alex Elliot said...

He must frequent the Y I go to.

12:28 AM

 

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