An Open Letter
To the dumbass who doesn’t know how to park their car in one spot:
Apparently you are not aware of the fact there are 7,499 other people working in the building and that parking spaces are at a premium for this office building. Or maybe you need new glasses to see the bright, white line that indicates where cars are to be parked. Or better yet, perhaps you are a parking space bully and want other people to know that you are special and require two spaces instead of one. Well, I have one suggestion for you if that is the case. There is a far away space located in the corner of the parking lot that is always available without other cars around it and you can take up as many spaces as you desire. I know this, because, thanks to my tardiness this morning, and poor parkers like yourself, I was forced to park my car in said lot, otherwise known as Bum Fuck Egypt.
Whatever your New Year’s resolution was this year, I would revise it to include parking lessons. Instead of spending all that money on your Volvo on loan payments and insurance, I would suggest trading it in for a lesser model and spending the difference on driving school. Because by the likes of your talents for parking, it would be safe to assume that you are probably not much better of a driver either.
The Pillow Chick
Andrew's birthday news to come at a later post. For today, I needed to get this letter out and off my chest as part of my all around crappy mood today...